 |
|  |
|---|
|
No Excuses for Sunday To make it possible for everyone to attend church next week, we are planning a special 'No Excuse Sunday'. 1. Beds will be placed in the aisles for those who say, 'Sunday is my only day for sleeping-in' 2. Eye drops will be available for those whose eyes are tired from watching TV too late on Saturday night. 3. We will have steel helmets for those who believe the roof will cave in if they show up for in Church. 4. Blankets will be on hand for those for whom the 'church is too cold'. Fans, for those for whom it's too hot. 5. We will have hearing aids for the parishioners who say 'the priest doesn't talk loud enough', and cotton wool for those who say 'the priest talks too loud'. 6. Score cards will be available for those who wish to count the hypocrites. 7. We guarantee that some relatives will be present for those who like to go visiting on Sunday. 8. There will be TV dinners for those who claim they can't go to church and cook dinner too. 9. A section of the church will have trees and grass for those who see God in nature, especially on the golf course. 10. The Altar will be decorated with a Christmas Crib and Easter Lilies, to create a familiar environment for those who have never seen the church without them. See you in church! (from a Tenerife Anglican Church Magazine) Published in the February/March 1998 edition of the Church Magazine
| |